Obsessing, Compulsive (9/1/09) Poem by Melissa Leddy

Counting, counting- constantly
Numbers, words, and movements
There's never quiet inside my head
Is there any way to silence this?

The certain sensations I need to avoid
Like paper, vaccums, and nail files
It's not that I'm scared but I don't want to face this
Having to constantly put myself on trial

Why am I doing this terrible thing?
Why- if it's driving me crazy inside?
Take a deep breath and start my day over
Each day it takes a million tries

Yet I still can't stop this ruckus
I can never slow the fast lane
I sit here and cound and I cry and I scream
And consistently confront the pain

But what am I doing all of this for?
So that one day I'll have a quiet minute?
I can't even fall asleep without counting my head off
All I want is to end this riot.