My 21st Birthday Poem by Vonnie Postit

i look through your pictures now that i
can see them.
you do not let me,
i force myself through the dots
of your life, drawing
myself into them in stick figure form.
not all of them of course, for i see that
all of you did not interest me.
not that i should have, but i was only
in love with you in the way that pencils
are in love with paper. i would punch holes
through you and change your blank slate
into paper mache everyday;
keeping it swift and clear and fun and
deep.
you have to admit that we were deep.
but then i left and you remained the
paper that was no longer shifting,
but static and broken and you realized
that i took every tool you naturally had
to make your life shape- shifting.
you always hated change.
but you loved the way i changed you,
so did i.
i hope he makes you happy and holds
your face and feels your warmth before
he kisses you.
i do not think i will ever love again. not
in the way that i loved you.
HOW CAN YOU BE SO POWERFUL
3 years and counting, Kate,
and i still cannot help but wonder if you
think about who we were, and who we
could be.
im sorry, and i never meant to carve
you into something so small.