Monstrare Poem by Ronnell Evans

This house a dictatorship
Learn to shut your mouth and follow directions
Or receive punishments
For your treason

You get under my skin
And leave your marks
Like footprints in the snow
Except your boots are laced with a virus

'Cause you're making me sick

This house is a dictatorship
Follow the rules and shut your mouth
Or hear the mouth of the one
That controls you with force

Stand before the almighty and choke on your words
And tremble in fear as she screams, shouts
Yells and roars
Out of frustration

This house is a dictatorship
'Cause my voice is silenced,
My actions are limited,
My thoughts are undermined

Listen to yourself and
Listen to no one else
Because you're the 'boss'
Of this world

Or just the boss of this house

This house is a dictatorship
'Cause I'm chained to the fence
Like some wild animal
That can't be trusted

I wonder if you really trust me
Let alone understand me
'Cause if you don't,
What's the point of being a good child?

This house is a dictatorship
'Cause your word is always right
And mine is always wrong
Even though you're never right about everything

Nearing eighteen with the mind of an adult
Just like you, I'm smart too
But in your eyes, I'm still five
And I can't possibly know anything

This house a dictatorship
'Cause you don't bother to comfort me
When I need it most
In the darkest of times

You refuse to talk to me
About anything
So how am I supposed to
Know what you're feeling and thinking?

This house is a dictatorship
'Cause you always yell and scream
Until your throat goes hoarse
And you do it with no remorse

You see things from your own perspective
And you dread compromise
'Cause it's either your way
Or no way at all

But things have changed

Now I speak my mind
Because I'm no longer a shy ten year old child.
Now I tune out your yelling and screaming
Because I'm no longer a scared ten year old child.

Now I don't speak a word at home
Because there's no point.
Now I lose myself in Xbox and the computer
Because I can't talk to you.

It's not even about being disobedient
Or disrespectful.
It's about not being a kid anymore
And not being treated like the young adult I am.

And I know for certain
That this house is a dictatorship
'Cause you'll be mad if you read this,
Even though there isn't another way;

Even though you made it this way.