Is It My Life? Poem by Veruschka Nicole Eiman

I lay down on my cold pillow
Have a feeling that someone is staring at my window
I just wished you know
know that this smile on my face
is fake
If only I had a secret place
Maybe a lake
where I could drown all my sorrows
But I guess I just have to hope
for better tomorrow's
I stand up with this pain& i sleep with this pain
It seems like this is how my life is suppose
to be or is it just me
or is it the truth i see?