If I Die Today Poem by Ayesha Riaz

If I die today,
I'll have the works of life undone,
Souls still empty, hearts still broken,
If I die today,
I'll leave a world unchanged,
With illustrations of pleasure left incomplete forever,
If I die today,
I'll leave a life not lived,
A lesson not learnt,
If I die today,
I'll have a bowl of despair,
A wish for love,
If I die today,
I'll have veins and arteries, that will soon echo,
And a heart tied to them, which would never beat,
If I die to day,
I'll cause a king's hope to fade,
And a queen's only love to die,
If I die today,
I'll leave my unworthy chattels behind,
The chattels for which I lived,
But against death they were only a part of paralyzed filth,
If I die today,
I'll never get a chance to re-live,
To make corrections,
But only a soul left to be questioned,
Left to be driven to hell,
From the lands of fairies that I once knew,
If I die today,
I'll have drafts of my files,
Unpublished, unseen,
If I die today,
I'll have myself incomplete,
Unknown.
...And if I die today,
I'll have a desire to be given a chance to pray to him once more,
To be forgiven once again,
To feel the contentment,
And the fascination again,
That I was once hypnotized with,
To utter those magic words once more,
That would melt his heart and bestow his love on me again,
'O lord, I was once mistaken, I now have no desire and no wish,
I don't ask you for money nor the power that I once lost,
I now have no desire and no wishes to be placed,
But only one....
Only a desire to live a little more,
A desire to live a little longer,
A desire to let the love in this chest beat again,
A desire to live a little longer,
A desire to be a little stronger,
A desire to be the king's hope once again,
A desire to be the queen's love again,
A desire to conquer to black night,
A desire to watch the beam of light from the east,
Entering in me once again,
A desire to feel my creator's warmth,
To be myself once more,
...And if I die today...
A barren canvas my life would be,
Impatient for just one fresh stroke of brush,
That could polish me forever.