I Hate Myself For Loving You Poem by Pitta Sudarshan Dev

It was once

You were my present and future
You were my world and life
You were my dream and thought
You were my longing and meeting

It is now I realize

You ruined my past and cursed my present
You made me alone in this world and left me to future confusion
You turned the dreams I dreamt as nightmares and thoughts so painful
You departed from my life and I wish that our meeting never happened

My dear one I realize now

I was the cause of pain to my dear ones and strained myself to be with you
I lost my companions and hardly cared when all my relationships were discarded
I never knew joy and freedom and surrendered myself as a slave to your happiness
I lost my charm as many say that my smile is my asset
I cursed my body and soul and cared not to know any other love

But you my dear

You are practical and am a foolish
You lived the present and I dreamt the future
You made the things happen and to make them happen I derelict my other responsibilities
You enjoyed freedom through me and never knew that I was only your driver
You desired other body and longed for another soul and I thought you were misled

Yes my dear one

Now I hate myself for loving you.