Hear Me Out, My Dear Catherina Poem by philip mtange

It is not that I did not love you
But my love was intertwined with self doubt and self deceit
I cared
I hope you realize that
Even when calamity stared in my face
I did care.

Our time together were fruitful
Sometimes overly so
We shared a passion
Pure
And so elegant in its simplicity.

Even as the tears come streaming down your cheeks
Remember
The good times
The small pleasures
We derived from love
And wipe the tears from eyes.

My resolution to love was prompted
Not by fear but by the reality of my feelings
For you
And it was actuated by your response.

As the journey of love comes to an end
The rough and tumble of growing up
The self-doubt and delusion
So prevalent in becoming
Has taken its toll on us.

I have loved you
My dear Catherina
And that love has wrought havoc upon my soul
And as I prepare to let go of you
My heart is stretched across the four corners of the world
Crying out in misery.

But I can no longer love
That which I do not know
For my painful realization
My dear Catherina
Was that I loved what you could be.