Falling Apart Poem by Joshua Hillard

I am falling apart,
For what?
Don't you see what I mean?
Can you express certain feelings,
Through the pain of memory?

All the times sitting, shaking,
Filling your mind full of hatred,
Not a person but yourself,
Hatred among everything else,

I was so close,
Now here I am,
Do you see what I must do?
The path is broken, the fork I'm lost in,
How could I see what is true,

Confrontations, lacerations,
Fills my chest with one sensation,
Scars reaching top to bottom,
Repeating words as alliteration,

Every wound cut so deep,
Watch the world as I begin,
No sin, but then,
A doors opens to let me in.

A stranger among you all,
No one there to catch my fall,
No home to call my own,
Just a room with four walls,

I got everything I need,
Yet, nothing at all,
I service my heart till I bleed,
In the end I begin to call,

Help me, please believe,
I'm nothing of the sort,
The world judges me,
Another place to call a court,

What's my verdict,
For I am hurting,
Wounded knees, battling thieves,
Praying I can see another morning,

I open my eyes, to wonder why,
It had to end as soon as it began,
Why I finished when I must start,
Why I live falling apart…