Day Sleepers Poem by Lillian Susan Thomas

Day Sleepers

Rating: 3.1


Grave-shift workers reach Zen-like focus

That sometimes amplifies noises -

Pecans thwacking the tin roof,

And squirrels scrambling after them -

Before everything dumbs down

Into the silent sea of sleep.



The motorcycles revving

Their guttural voices

Thick with machismo

Rumble into dreams as thunder

From the wedges of towering nimbus.




The neighbors arguing,

The dogs yip-yapping in the yard,

And cats yowling under the house

As they each fight over territory,

All are lifted into dreams,

Like so many alien abductions

And become the shadow play

Of conflicts my soul is engaged in.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Susan Jarvis 13 September 2009

This poem captures all auditory anxieties of that fretful daylight slumber. Your wonderful choice of onomatopoeias – thwacking, yowling, yip-yapping - ensures that the poem is rife with niggling noises throughout. I love the way they are ‘lifted into dreams’. You manage to make an aural nightmare an art form – wonderful stuff! S :)

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Ray Schreiber 25 October 2009

Nice work...you've vividly painted a daily scene I lived years ago for a short time. The pre-sleep world of audio images hasn't changed a bit (except my pecans were acorns) .

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Samanyan Lakshminarayanan 24 October 2009

the noises and activities all around well captured..lovely 10

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Apothecary Montague 21 October 2009

Before everything dumbs down Into the silent sea of sleep love this line, great poem, great idea. i work a 24hr. shift and have felt this feeling many times, never thought to write about it. Well done.

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Mehta Hasmukh Amathalal 28 September 2009

All are lifted into dreams, Like so many alien abductions And become the shadow play Of conflicts my soul is engaged in..............beautiful piece of poetry and i admire it. the sleep becoems battle ground and form a shadow play in dreams... lovely imagination....10 read mine all dreams not come true... at cross road.... a place callled home

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Anand Madhukar 20 September 2009

A wonderfully written piece, with a very keen eye for detail. The words effortlessly capture the mundane day sounds and turn them into something with much more significance in the last few lines.

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