Class Of 64 Poem by Hazel Connelly

I saw an ad in the local paper
A reunion for the class of 64
I thought I wouldn't mind going
I've never been to one before

It should be great seeing class mates
So I rented a tux and black tie
Put new batteries in me hearing aids
Bought a wig and a black dye.

I emptied a bottle of old spice
Did me toupee nice with brylcream
I soaked me teeth in steredent
Then gargled with some Listerine

I soon arrived in splendid form
Smelling my very best
It was in an old church hall
And I wasn't very impressed.

Everyone stood gawping
I only wanted to impress
Well they didn't say
How the heck I should dress.

They came round with name tags
But didn't have one for me
Then it came to me in a flash
I was in the class of 63.