Circle Of Pain Poem by shahkela sandridge

it started with a blade but...
ended witha burn emotionally
and physically the blade was good
but if your going to do art on
your self youmight as well
exspirement right? i went from a blade
to doing needle and thread work in
my right leg to using a earser on both
wrist to using a comb on my upper
left arm because i had nothing else
then i couldnt find a needle so i
empervised and used a safty pin
and stick it in my leg then close it
and let it sit while it gives a stingy
feeling that last then i discover
ice and salt i try it... i absolutly love it
it burns stings and make me grin
beyond belief for once with
minimum evidence to show for it

that was my circle of pain for years
starting AROUND 2006 what else will i try
so i can self harm but people dont understand
unless they have walked that path
they dont understand that self harm is
like any other addiction it makes you feel like
your on cloud 9 but
it doesnt solve anything but proves weakness
because it is either your first orlast resort
and your trading one pain for another one
we go through ups and downs and that
circleof pain i have created for myself
dies and get s reborn...
my circle of pain