Barney Degroote Poem by Steven B Taylor

Humorous


Barney DeGroote

Opus 68

Let me introduce myself,
I'm wonderful Barney DeGroote.
In appearance, I'm told, I resemble an elf,
From my head, to the top of my foot.

When people know me, they will generally find,
That I have fingers, and toes like us all.
I have only the interest in being so kind,
But something keeps making me fall.

I'm in love with my name; It's Barney DeGroote,
Which translates as Barney the great.
I realize that will allow me to claim,
That I have a momentous fate.

I'm important and marvelous, this I can show.
I'm the world's most intelligent man.
I have never been known to be slow,
At advice giving, do what I can.

Because of these factors, I have a great trust
To give to all people, advice.
To help out my fellows, with me is a must,
No matter, the pain or the price.

But lately, I've noticed that people are shy,
And won't come in, and ask me to help.
They must not recognize, I'm a great guy,
And try to make out by themselves.

Unhappy, I am, due to this recent turn,
Of events, that I cannot control.
I try harder to help, but they never learn
That I have a heaven-sent goal.

I've grown clumsy, and find that it's harder to walk,
With the angels when you're in a drought.
It's difficult, also, to continue to talk,
When you have your foot in your mouth.

So remember my name, if you need a friend.
It's Barney, yes Barney the Great.
If ever you wish to set a new trend,
To help you is my heavenly fate.

Steven B. Taylor
November 12,1997