A Tightwad Tooth Fairy Called Griselda Poem by David Harris

There was a tightwad tooth fairy
and Griselda was her name.
When you had your teeth out
and put them under the pillow
she would come along and pinch them
and leave nothing in return.
You would wake up in the morning;
look under your pillow for some dosh,
but under your pillow was empty there.
As you looked at the empty space,
you knew straight away
that Griselda the tightwad tooth fairy
had been about.
Complaints followed complaints
to fairly land
about this tightwad tooth fairy.
The fairy council
had never heard of such a thing.
A tightwad tooth fairy.
Oh, this could never be.
They had never had a case
of a tooth fairy leaving no money.
Something had to be done.
Griselda was called
and stood before the council
and asked to explain why
she was a tightwad
and left no money behind.
The miserly tooth fairy
thought for a moment.
She was saving some money
to buy herself a fairy yacht,
only it took a lot of teeth
to purchase one of them.
For her crimes,
she was sent to work with Santa’s Elves.
She sits in the toy factory
banging happily away,
because if the truth were known
she didn’t want to be a tooth fairy anyway.

5 May 2008