A Prayer I Wrote Poem by joshua reid

I feel light touching me
but is it from heaven or Hell?
What is this I think I see
my heart truly cannot tell
My nerves are wild
control is a thing of the past
I miss that smile
and the jubilan way you would laugh
I am Satin in human flesh
don't deny it, it is true
Sometimes your life was a stress
I felt relieved to not deal with you
But I miss you Dad
I wish I had knowledge of your location
And with all the talks we had
We never disscussed your destination
So I wonder, where is your soul
that I hear in my heart on occasion
I cannot contain my center of control
You always were smart on those days when
I told you of my dreams and anxieties
you took it in and observed it with patience
You saw the stress was stifiling me
You could see the issue, burn to the basics
God, forgive my father his faults
If I have to work twice as hard in my life
To make up for what he lost
I'll take these scars and bargain with Christ
I need you Lord, no one else
I heed your advice in the Word
Why can't I take his salvation myself?
My life is pathetic, just trite and obsurd
I played the cards I'm recieve
I get three aces and fold
He got nothing but he believed
Kept a straight face and was bold
He was good man despite it all
even when he would yell at my mother
He was in pain, I heard him call
I know deep down inside...he loved her
Dad hear me, wherever you are
even if you're not in Heavenly planes
You are always my star
I love you, and that will never change