Me After Us
1.
I lay in the corner bed
Looking at the wall
Peeling off in scraps
And thought it was a reflection.
I took air inside of me
Holding it for five seconds
Five seconds for which
I wasn't empty.
I had forgotten everything
Everything
From the rain drenched kiss
To the summer morn goodbye.
Everything
Which once was
Was no more
And neither was I.
2.
Or so I thought
Until a car pulled in the driveway
And a knock cracked against the door
And I knew it was you.
You came in
And sat in your old chair
Your hand against your old desk
With your new wedding ring.
How are you? You asked
I couldn't remember what day it was
But suddenly I could remember
Everything else.
My tears in your hair
Your arms around me
Your lips on mine
Your presence every night.
3.
I said I'm fine
I said I've a new job
I said I'm eating properly
I said everything is OK.
You sat there
And listened to my lies
Every now and then saying
Good.
Then you said you had to go
I smiled and said sure
Remembering how you had left
Long ago.
Afterwards it wasn't the same
Every shipwreck bobbed
On the surface of my mind
As I reached for the gun.