a light in the dark

Pain thunders through my body
Once again I have landed face first into the ground

Once again I have been ridiculed
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I had a family once
I had sisters
I still have a mother
But it no longer feels like my family
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Its not fair it has never been fair but that is the life we have chosen
on one side the broken family tries to stick together.
Forming a life passed the broken glass.
yet stuck looking in the pieces.
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Lost in the dark
Stuck in oblivion
together we stand
hand in hand......
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There is a voice buzzing in my ear
No I am not crazy though sometimes I wish to be
Its loud and constant it’s low and eternal
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Still I walk this path leaving nothing but tears of sorrow and confusion. Religion you confuse me so, you give me everything and yet I receive nothing.
Who is the man behind many masks who is the one who holds the strings of our lives? Be you man or be you essence? Do you breathe this air of ours? Or do you sing the song of the soul?
Do you gaze upon us with loving eyes? Or do you glare down at us with the eyes of superiority? Do you whisper calming words to those who believe and forget those who like my self walk in circles? I am on the verge of tears on the edge looking down at insanity and back to its brother sanity.
I am sinner with a belief a follower with no leader. Will you play your flute for me and guide me into your open arms? Or will you plug my ears and cover my eyes sending me to strive on my own? Who do I send this letter to hoping to get a response?
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I am so tired of putting up a good front
putting on a fake smile for all to see
making sure my friends dont see what is really happening with me
I am broken, heart shattered, and soul tired
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