We Filipinos Have Also Our Own Nationalistic Pride Poem by RIC BASTASA

like you we are also nationalists in our own
brown right
try disciminating us and we also know how to discriminate you
(of course)
in our country (Lang) only

if you are hospitable to us we are even more hospitable to you
we have roasted pigs for dinner
fresh cocoa, hot with gelatenous rice (suman) and sweet ripe mangoes
served on breakfast
and some delicacies of fried frogs, snakes, eels, and dog meat,
wild boars,
(sa mga bukot bukot lang pud noon)
and coconut meat (butong palana ba?) and pork (adobo nga gasinaw sinaw
sa tambok tambal sa highblood)

we provide you free board and lodging and free ballroom dancing
in our barangay with the town mayor even as emcee
for your welcome party

and lots and lots of free entertainment and it will only take you
with little american things to flatter us

giving us chocolates
and some key chains and books (nga dili pud namo basahon noh
kay daghang trabaho sa bukid or book marks
to reciprocate us

but take note, if you insult us, the whole barrio shall be against you,
and some cannot hold their temper
(ag mga adis adis ug mga ilaga kaniadto nga mokilaw ug atay sa tawo
kadtong dili madutlan ug bala)
they will eat you raw and you embassy will have a hard time tracing your
whereabouts
or your bones and other body parts scattered in some
parts of this philippine archipelago

see? welcome to our country. Behave Baby.
No one will skin you alive.

so? be good always, and we will also be good to you.
Reciprocity. Mutuality. International Cooperation.

These are our keys to open our country's doors.
(galot pud ang pinoy? noh?)
And there are no closing hours.