Ugly: Scars Poem by Payyton Egerstaffer

Ugly: Scars



Scarred for life, but you can't see
What that 'man' has done to me
So clever, but not academically
The weaker ones, he does bully.

Manipulate, control and use
Calculate, humiliate, abuse
Love is sex and sex is love
Does not believe in God above.

Swore on Oath to tell the truth
Without fear of his demise
'Do 'ever it takes, to get what I want'
To me, admitted all his lies.

The physical body can heal itself
Leaves a scar, look what happened to me
But when the mind has suffered ill-health
The damage is harder to see.

The road to recovery is painful and long
Sabotaged by the thoughts of my past
Am I so wicked, what did I do wrong?
And how long will my suffering last?

Take this and that pill
Do this and do that
You'll feel better, not so ill
And then we can chat.

But my scars are not healing
They're festering away
My insides they are eating
Bit like M.R.S.A.

I know it will kill me
Eventually, someday
Because it's all so consuming
Every night, every day...
In every way.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM

Payyton. I don't know where you stand now since I have not had the opportunity of speaking to you in some time, but this pain.. I know a man that can help. His name is Jesus! He loves you and well the ones that abused you he would make them pay. even so. and it would be tough to do it. you must forgive them for wht they did. Technically forgiving someone that hurt you is more hurtful to them than it is for you... after all they don't want you to have peace... anyhow.. I pray you have find God (christ) and i hope you are happy. Les

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DELETED NOW 30 January 2009

That's scarey to be like that. I think I would just end my life cos I couldn't wait for all the pain to abandon me.

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Payyton Egerstaffer

Payyton Egerstaffer

Fort Polk, Louisiana
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