The Great Laceration (2007) Poem by David Joel Rodriguez

Water fell cold, becoming increasingly hot
Never minding my own lifeless clock

Alone, nobody to reach all night
I guess what I was doing was right

Thought I'd have one glass of wine
Thinking one glass would make it fine

I guess I thought I'd see it rush out of me
releasing whose ever love was killing me

Bleed out whatever was left of my, or any love
mixture of pills and wine and terrible thoughts

Figuring out how I could slowly fade
no one to turn but the Seppuku blade

Nobody in mind caused it at this point
but I'm sure there'll be plenty to disappoint

I just gave in to many things
and unable to confess any sins

'The ones who I loved but hated me,
the ones who I hated but loved me'

I sure thought about plenty of people,
many who believed in me, said I had a role

Many things though, I could not solve
those who loved me could've resolved

Moments that helped me to last
but will haunt me even after I pass

They helped me last one more day with them
they helped me realize life, yet overwhelmed

They really tried, but they actually didn't know
though, I didn't know either, but...I had to go

I naturally seemed quiet, yet spoke when spoken too
When they turned to find me, I escaped, they had no clue

I still went about my business, alone of course
ending up at home dealing with my life's remorse...

...Now...I am surrounded in my own red warm water
waiting for the pills to take effect without a matter

Preparing again for my last pain relieving sting
still wondering what the others were thinking

With one primary question everybody has to ask
with or without evidence it was everyone's task

'What was going through that poor souls mind?
Didn't he care what he was leaving behind? '

Yes, all have to ask, but now is my time, my sensation
Unexpected, my first, my last, My Great Laceration...