Telemarketer Poem by Justin Reamer

Hey, ma'am,
Or is your name Mr.?
I can't quite recall,
But if you wouldn't mind
Listening in for a bit,
I will gladly give you the opportunity of a lifetime.

I know this call may be bothersome,
But I need you to listen for a bit,
Since this is how I make my living,
By selling things over the phone,
And, to be frank, I am quite poor,
And I have a family that suffers greatly,
And I don't know if you have a family,
But I have several mouths to feed.

I struggle every day to feed them all,
And I want them to succeed and
To be in a better position than what I am in now,
For I cannot help the world that I live in,
And this world does not have much to offer them right now.

I want the best for my sons and daughters,
And I know you'd want the same for them, too,
So please, lady, or sir, whatever you may be,
Please listen for at least a second.
A minute of your time won't hurt,
I promise.
If you do not like my offer,
Then go ahead and hang up;
It's okay,
But if you do,
Please listen and try to corroborate
With me as much as possible.
I guarantee that my product works,
And I am sure you'll love it, too.
It's just that I am a poor man,
And I need your help to get by.

If you're game, I'm game, too,
For I want to help my children,
And my wife and I work full-time
And barely ever get to see them.
So if you're game, I'm game, too.

Since it sounds like you're okay,
I thank you very much for listening to me.
I will tell you that this product I am selling,
This Shark Vacuum Cleaner,
Is probably the best there is to have.
I know it sounds crazy,
But Shark never loses its suction,
And it always works, no matter what,
Unless you break it, of course.

Many customers love Shark,
And they have had it for over 10 years,
And I know you love it, too.
If you want to see me tomorrow,
I will gladly see you,
And you can try out the new vacuum to your happiness.

Anyway, thank you for taking the time to speak to me;
You don't have to buy the Shark
Because I get paid to show it off to you,
But I thank you SO much for helping me out.
May God bless your heart.