Tears Fall Anyway Poem by Allysyn Bryant

I don’t remember crying so much,
Not since I was a kid.
It, in a way, frightens me.
Does this make me weak?
Yes, I am a girl,
But not all girls are weepy.
I’m, for damn sure, not!
Though, no matter how I try.
My tears fall anyway.

It’s almost as if I dread the day.
Wondering, what will I screw up today?
Every time I turn around
I’ve done something wrong
Or missed another deadline.
I’m getting really tired
Of begging for that extension…
Of telling my teachers that I’m fine…
Of lying to my friends, saying I’m okay…
When the honest truth is that I’m not.
I don’t even know what’s wrong with me.
Sometimes it feels like
I have to use up all my strength
Just to get through the day.
And no matter how hard I try
I seem to always end the day with a cry.

Can’t sleep at night
So I stay up and think…
I’m not happy with my life.
Though I don’t know why?
There are many who aren’t as lucky as I.
But still I feel like my life is a living hell.
Feeling selfish at the thought, I cry.
It doesn’t matter how much I try
My tears fall anyway.

The small drops of rain
Makes a calming sound for me.
I could spend hours walking in the rain
And for a while, I forget the pain.
Finding myself wishing it’d all go away?
Yea. I do.
Looking down the street
Unknowingly planning a way to leave
This isn’t me.
Who’ve I become?
I cry again.

I have a small gray bear.
His head has been ripe off,
And sewn back on, twice now.
He’s my favorite of all the rest.
Irreplaceable he is.
People tell me to rid of him.
What they don’t understand is
That bear, it’s part of who I use to be.
He reminds me of, well, me.
Tears fall away.

Pack all my things…
Stow them away in a car…
Soon to be on my way…
A fantasy in my head.
But one day, perhaps, it’ll be my reality.
I’m tired of my tears falling.

January 15,2009