Senseless Poem by sticker mykes

It's so weird, almost deja'vu, no really its like i went back in time, GOD it was so freaky, i couldnt have imagined it like this.
It was him, wasnt it, i couldnt look at him, what is wrong with me,
I think im losing it, its friggin hard to concentrate on anything, What will i do, what do i do, im going nuts already,
I cant live like this, i had him, only 3 feet away, he did look at me,
He knew it was me.....or was it just a wild hallucination i dunno
I just know it was way too much of a coincidence, it just couldnt have it just couldnt,
I was planning this lunch for far too long it couldnt have been but could it? did my lord wanted me to see what it really is...
That i didnt miss that much, he was talking in almost whisper,
The glances towards me suggested that it had to do something with me
I dont know, am i being just plain paranoid i dunno,
Its too soon to say anything i dunno, God i need ur help,
im in so deep, i cannot forget no matter how hard i try,
Was it my fault, was it a mistake?
I've always been making mistakes my life was this an important one, comeon,
Whats with me and the regrets, im not like this? ? ? ?
I've never looked back, what the hell did u do to me, or did my loneliness finally caught up with me,
I have to go back to my previous state, i cant stay like this for one second, im so very volatile,
I could do just about anything, dont make me do something stupid....im so famous for doing absurd things,
I need to get out of my head, i have to keep my self so busy that i cant find time to breathe, just dive in routine,
I know there is a lone shark there too, what can you do,
Thats not within ur reach just live with it till he comes back,
You have to keep it together, there isnt any other way,
No ones ready to help you out of this one, you are on your own....
Just pray