My Final Goodbye (My Favorite) Poem by Michael Lee Buchanan

I am a ghost, walking in a house of horrors
I am lost, within a soul-less body
I bear the markings, of a hopeless ending
and yet I still walk upon my masked feet
looking for some sort of salvation
or a way to be free of this starvation.

I have prayed upon scabbed knees
to find no prevail upon my hopes,
but more emptiness without dreams
and every time I step forward a foot
I fall into unopened arms and onto the floor
where I loose every step I ever took.

My only hope is for loneliness to finally leave me
and for my only memories to be shattered dreams.
But my eyes still can see the scars on my wrists
and my ears can still hear the words "your just sick"
And only they know the cure, to my problem called "sadness"?

How can I trust another living soul
not to betray me
and destroy the only piece of me not yet broken?
The fragile little thing called a heart
still beats for hope and prays for help.

How can I scream out for help
when no-one can hear a damn thing?
And how can I pretend its not in vain,
when I let the knife slip and hit the major vein?
How do I keep this suicide a secret,
never meant to tell, never meant to be heard?

The men and women who claim they help
are the cause of my pain, the solutions they dealt.
How can you say have a heart,
for the men who "saved" me?
When all they did was enslaved me, into a life I hate?

And what is this to you,
is my life nothing more than a game
a prize for you to take?
Well I am getting closer and closer
to the edge of the world and I don't think you can understand!

The beauty that I can show you,
but the pain that I withhold
hides me away from you and everything I want to be.
So what is this, but another sacrificial ceremony
meant for my soul to be bonded to a darkened heart.

So now I can scream, without fear of the unknown
because I have lived to see the love,
and I have lived to see the hate
so I can go willingly, knowing there is nothing in the wait
and nothing in the making but death for me,
and a final goodbye is all I can handle to see.