Mixed Signals Poem by Maya Reid

I love you.
I’m in love with you.

But look at me.
I’m pathetic.
I’m self-destructive.
I won’t do anything
but bring you down.
You deserve
better
than me.

But how
can I let you go?
I can’t give you up.
If you love someone,
you've got to let them go –
but I can’t.
I can’t live without you.
I won’t live without you.

You are me,
and I hope
that I am you.
To me,
we are one.
Without you,
I cannot be.
I’ll just wither up
and die.

I don’t want to hurt you.
Baby,
I love you.
But I’m not good enough for you.
You are going to go so far,
and I don’t want to drag you down.

I want to be with you.
I want to be with you
more that I ever thought
I could want anything.
I love you
more that I ever thought
I could love anyone.

But I can’t do this to you.
You’d be better off without me.

I’ll die
but to ensure that you live,
it’s a small price to pay.
Trust me,
there are worse things than death.

I’m a mess.
I know I am.
I panic.
I forget to breathe.
I am an endless flowing river
of tears.

But you stay with me.
The only reason
I can see for that
is that you found something
beautiful
in me.
You held that beauty up
for me to see,
and you alone
have the power
to make me feel beautiful.

You gave me strength,
and freedom,
and introduced me
to me.
You showed me
how life can be.

You caught me once,
but I’m slipping,
and I need you
to catch me again.
You’re in the process of teaching me
how to fly,
angel of mine.
I can’t do it without you.
I can’t make it without you.

What I’m trying to say now,
though,
is that I could make it with you.
If leaving would hurt you
as much as it’s going to hurt me –
if,
deep down inside,
you do love me –
then,
by all means,
stay.

We can get through this together.
I can get through this with you.
Together we have power.
Love is more powerful
than anything else
in the entire cosmos.
Love conquers all.

If I have your love,
I can conquer this.
Talk about mixed signals,
but stay with me.
Save me.
Please.