It Was My Fault Poem by Nae Tyler

I was never spared
not even in the most merciful of moments
I hate myself for that
face to face with truth
I couldn't raise my eyes from the ground
even if my shame would've allowed it
I always thought it was the worst
being taken for granted
I found now its far worse
to take someones love for granted
and now my stuttering lips
cant even mumble the words
words that are tearing me apart to not say
I understand if you cant forgive me
but please at least know
I'm sorry
to be lied to makes me wonder
where is the good left to love?
but to be told the bitter truth opposed to a lie
makes me want nothing more
then for the tears to leave me in peace
and for the sorrow to release its death grip
and all at the same time
I want it to stay
so I wont lose the feeling
of just what misery is
how I self-inflicted it without realizing
tears flowing
from a mistake I've brought to life
hurts worse
than any blade