I Just Wanted You To Know... Poem by Wishing For Perfection

I just wanted you to know...
Those days when your gone.
I think to myself 'did he do it? '
I worry as the day goes by.
Not a single phone call.
Not even a tiny text.

My mind races.
Thinking of all the possible
ways you could have left me.
Thinking of all the promises
you would have broke to me.

I try to myself that im overreacting.
That your just sick.
Youll be back tomorrow.

For the most part it works...
But for how long will it work?

I know your intentions.
I know what your biggest wish is.
I know you cut. I know you puke.
But i still stay silent.
Only shaking my head when you
tell me about your lastest cut.
Or the most recent meal you purged.

I wish i could say the things
i thought, the things i feel.

You tell me i need saving.
That you worry about me.
That you want to be the
one who will always be
there for me.

But how am i to believe that
when all i hear out of your
mouth is im having a breakdown
I cant do it anymore.
Just one amazing cut
and it would all end.

You have no idea the tears
i have shed for you.
I would never dare to admit it.

I try to act happy.
Pretend that the conversations
never even happened.
But as the days go by.
They get more intense.

I dont know how long
i will be able to hold it in.
But i just wanted you to know.

Your forever in my throughts.
Whether its wonder or worry.
Happiness or sadness.
Your never far away...