Goodbye(The Last Poem That Mentions You) Poem by Elizabeth Tyease Collins

I saw you that last time right in front of me,
tears in your eyes and a hole in your heart at my dining room table
at my house.

I didn't care how many tears you shed, it was done.
My heart no longer felt what it did weeks ago,
I no longer needed you,
never craved for your touch,
never ached whenever you left me.
Nada, nothing.

You stared up at me,
hope and desperation leaking from your pores,
you looked deep within me and you saw me...I was cold.
I was cold because I knew this would be it.
No more late nights looking up at the night sky, the moon being a spotlight for our hearts
wondering if there were people watching our love. We were the example of God's perfect angels.
Lasting conversations of us speaking of our future,
our kids having kids,
growing old and wrapped up in each others arms till the end of time
no more,
of sitting on the phone for hours listening to our hearts beat wondering if we could
get any higher than we were at that very moment.


I knew it was all over.

Your eyes sparkled and I saw tears flow down your cheeks.

I never wanted to be the one that had to do it, but I didn't wanna lie,
we faded,
and everyday I knew it yet you held onto me like a frightened child.
I never knew that day would haunt me everyday of my life.

4 years, one month and 7 days later you're in a relationship, pushing towards marriage because you want it to work.
Because in your mind you're running out of time and you need to find a way to find yourself fast within her
but Who's been there for you the past two relationships AFTER me? Me.
Because the day I let you go was the day I took a part of myself with you, so I followed you.
See, I was so strong,
well I was trying to be strong without you,
so I stayed by your side and helped you through your second heartbreak after me.
You cried on my shoulder and I held you closer thinking, 'If I hold you close enough to feel my heartbeat, would you lean closer and hear
it beat your name? '
Would you be blind of the lies written all over my face that the girl that your with is the one that you can truly take in
as yours,
I...was your way of escape. I was the air that you breathed to your lungs I was your heroin I was...your masterpiece.

You're gone now.
And today I sit here and listen to our song over and over,
stuck in the past of what we were, what we are, and what we could've been.
I used to write your name on my skin because your last name looked so beautiful next to my own,
because I knew it was real, it was sincere.

I've grown up and I see that you are no longer the person that I lean on,
I learned how you used me and abused me mentally,
had me self inflicting my lies and denial to myself to make yourself a better person I...was your punching bag.
So goodbye.

Goodbye to all the lost time and the endless nights of crying.
Goodbye to all the times that I felt like I was so close to getting you back but you led me on
and I followed like a sick puppy wanting for their master.
Goodbye to the me that used to hang on your every word,
the girl that used to cry everytime I would hear your name because the words were the kerosene that
set my heart aflame,
self inflictions and thin paper wrists I was slit and burned,
but like a phoenix i burn and rise and return,
new and unscarthed,
goodbye to you,
this is the last poem that'll ever mention you.