Farewell Blythe Spirit Poem by Margaret Kollmer

This poem is dedicated to James Clarke, South Africa's funniest columnist on his semi-retirement from The Star with my gratitude for allowing me to contribute so much of my nonsense verse to his Stoep Talk column for so many years. The practice of writing Mary Mary verses and parodies and all sorts of 'pomes' as he calls them was invaluable.

I'm devastated - quite deflated
To know you are retiring
(I'd call you cool and not x-rated
but no, not quite retiring!)
What will I do, my heart screams out
With all my bits of writing?
The mini-comps, the tests of skill
That set my wits a-fighting.

I've got to know you pretty well
Sometimes I've even bitten
Your leg pulls and your jammy jibes
Ho! What I've almost written!
Important comps I've entered
Qwerty soup, perhaps a pun
And how to welcome tourists
Saying 'Voetsak' watch 'em run!

Of Shakespeare, dare I say it
I hardly knew a jot
Till in a comp I learned his wife
Was Anne and not Shalott.
A one-word sentence - pshew! he's mad!
The challenge was too great
I M N MK... R U 1 2?
And Mary's lamb got ate.

But no, M.K. don't flippant be
This is a serious occasion
For sure you'll make the Beckett Show
On the state of the writing nation.
I know I speak for all who read
The Stoep - Oh how we'll miss ya
And now it has to come to me
What rhymes with Madagascya!