Death In The Skies-05 April,1976 Poem by Jean Rojas

I am myself in shadows
Forsaking the dawn
I am myself in darkness
Among a crowd of one
A solitude of plenty…
I am the words to
A rounded song,
A song to a husky voice
A voice to an empty silence
That I can not hear…
What do I fear?

This magnitude of life,
I wish that it had passed
Me by…
If I had been an ordinary lad,
Then maybe I won’t be so sad.
my end would not have been
So bad,
In my listless, senseless compulsions
Brewed an endless stream
Of addiction,
Far worst that I could even have
Imagined, in all the years
That I have survived..
What do I fear?

One happy thought,
Just one happy thought
I had none..
All is gone…
Alone
Louder, and louder
The deafening nothingness
Leaves me alone
Do not leave me alone…

Do you fear me?
Do you fear what I had become?
I had everything
That is nothing
Of true value
But everyone has a price
So I must pay the price
Of my folly..
My castle is my prison
An asylum for my kingdom

Long, long time ago
I used to know a different man
But he was gone before
I could remember his name….

(For: Howard R.Hughes jr.)