Broken Mirror Poem by Jamal Brown

I look through this jagged glass; this broken mirror. All I see is a sinner. I see all the hours everyone waisted trying to love me. I see the hours I've waisted away lusting after some poor girls flesh. Wanting what wasn't, isn't, never will be, and was never meant to be mine. The day's and the week's thrown away in jealousy because another man had what I wanted. I wasn't right. I see all those people who tried to help me, and I stepped on them. Standing in the way of my own progress. How could they love me, when I hated myself. How could they forgive me, when I couldn't forgive myself? How could they need me, when I don't even need myself? I think about Jesus 'The One, who died so that I could live'. Why would He do that for someone like me? Someone so despicable. So disgusting. So disappointing. I remember that I'm seeing myself through a broken mirror. This is not who I am. Not anymore. Not since Jesus released me from the prison I built around myself. I've been washed clean. I don't have to hide anymore.
I see myself through this beautiful glass; this healed mirror. I am beautiful. I am absolutely wonderful. I am lovable and I'm learning how to love others. I am needed. I am not perfect, but I am forgiven. My past, if you can bare to look at it, is tarnished, damaged, ruined, and full of ugly black smudges that test me and tempt me day in and day out. My present is not perfect, but no where near my past. And my future? Crystal clear.