Black And Brown Poem by Yolanda Mbatha

Making my way down town
Fully aware of mams’s Bantu time
I see a man in black and brown
In my fears I started to drown
Began to frown
take off my crown
And what’s meant to be my night gown

Could this be my first time?
Where I give up my precious dime
Where my cries and his sighs are meant to rhyme

Another beast in brown and black
With a sacred purity to hijack
Now a 3rd and a 4th man
Were my legs awake I would have ran
On the typically black tar I’m forced to lie down
Without a bed told to give head
My hand to the beast unleashed was lead
In it slid, out it bled
For a seraphic moment I was partially dead

Anal pain I did receive
For they all had a mark to leave
Cry no longer, no 5min was longer
I wish I was stronger
His penetration entered my system
The rest I was to drink off him
Sour milk gone wrong was how it tasted
I observed as my so called precious dime twitched
Only moments later I was ditched

A checklist I did make
Did I ache?
Did he penetrate?
He just wasn’t some sickly mate

A process originally to multiply the nation
Used for some assassin sensation
This peculiar emotion
A deformed heart, please take into consideration
No1 to wipe away the tears
Blood stains invisible to peers
No1 to discard my fears
The eyes never will dry,
Without reason to try
Afraid to shut them close
As the scream echoes after the voice froze
I no-longer belong to me
Do I define pain or does pain define me
4 it is now 5years down the line
And I still search for that precious dime
One step at a time
Searching for a motive for that crime

It's always a war, it's always a fight.
Acceptance, and love, and hatred abound
to burn out the darkness, to soak in the light.
Minds and words explode without a sound.
I claw my way up, I try to survive,
Some days it feels like I'm no-longer alive.

The breathe of night lulls in a scent in its arms
And grants me a bouquet of blood
To mother and keep me from all that harms
And you; Just let me cry for you abandoned and let me die

When you let that man in black and brown
Do as he pleases with my precious dime