A Rejected Love Affair Poem by Matthew Holloway

As an openly bisexual male,
I frequented websites and aps,
Of a particular scene,
I chanced upon a Russian gentleman,
Who had views quite obscene
A very much closeted chap,
This Vladimir appeared to be,
I denied his advances made,
And worried over a threat of invasion,
My balklands were to remain untouched,
And any peninsula left free,
My dear Putin I asked,
My lands are not for thee,
Stay your tanks and arms,
Rest your regiments at home,
And so the Russian winter came,
There the winter member fell,
Poor Vladimir could not win his task,
An embarrassing moment I must admit
For all his bragging and bluster,
His ambitious boast,
Little Vladimir slipped away,
A rejected affair who wept away.