I Just Don'T Understand Poem by Amy Fifita

Faith is more than religion,
It is beleiving, it is hope.
And you stand there asking why not?
Disagreeing with my point of view.
But I don't want to let go,
And you don't want to help me up.
So I cuss, I rebel,
And still you think you're not a sinner,
So you judge me.
It isn't your place.
Where was God when I was asking for help?
Where was he when I didn't know what to do?
Where was he when I took the fall,
The knife, the drug.
Where is he now when I'm crying for him,
When I'm sheding a tear of hate,
Of anger,
Of pain?
So don't tell me to become a christian,
Because he loves me.
'Cause I hate love,
It caused my pain, my doubt, my anger,
My tears.
So don't stare at me like that,
As if I'm no good,
'Cause I already know.
I'm worthless, weak,
All the things you said I was,
And I already know.
My scars remind me of that all,
Of my stupidity,
My Hate, doubt, pain.
Please don't hate me,
'Cause I already hate myself.
So just don't,
Cause I just don't understand.
'Cause faith is more than religion,
It is beleiving, it is hope.