Exercises for Weight Loss in No Time at All Poem by Kiki Dimoula

Lie down. On something hard.
At first your leisure vertebrae may hurt
but gradually, painlessly, immobility
straightens its back till it stands there like a cypress.

Now compress your bad habits
into one rigid line.
Rest your hands on your chest
like the makeshift wings of a provisional angel.
Do not shift position.
The supine rows best.

Don't be afraid. Fear makes you fat,
it contains hunger.
Don't chew on sensations. Too many calories.
They cause the fat of deprivations.

Close your eyes, please
no dubious chinks
no lollipops of light.
They emit ultraviolet nostalgia.

Fully exhale, hold still
don't breathe, don't breathe
lest only half the ferryman
appear on the X-ray.

Let yourself slide down sleep.
You just relax, I'll play
your mother's lullaby on tape
hush little baby hush
like it or not I say.

Weigh yourself. Please hold still:
nested inside your body a scale awaits.