skitzophrenic lost

So many long days
That I can't remember
So many hard nights
That lasted forever
...

Today has changed me
I realize your gone forever
I won't forget this
But will I regret this?
...

Where does your God go,
When you need him the most.
Does he hide in the clouds?
Or reach out and come close?
...

Are you monster? Or just make believe?
Is it fate I’ve gone blind? Or is this what I see?
You can’t be real/ only I live in me
But when I talk/ you always answer
...

Lets close our eyes forever
We can drift away in space
I'll hold your hand in mine
And we'll find our special place
...

Some how time goes on
But I feel trapped in the past
No matter what I do I can't be free
I prayed to god to end this lie
...

I'm drunk,
But that's no surprise
A little alcohol,
Makes you feel alive
...

I hope you feel like me one day
I hope it eats away at you
I hope it makes you go insane
I hope you want to bleed
...

Everyday when I wake up
I feel like things will change
Like this dark cloud will leave
And this world will be sane
...

Every time I hear your voice
I keep thinking things will change
My friends told me to lose hope
But I don't want to go on another day
...

You crushed me, Like a title wave
I reached out for you, But you wouldn't save
So now I'm drowning, In a thousand tears
My heart calls for you, But you don't hear
...

Running faster than words can chase
Another monster seeing me face to face
Try and hide and you will see
The dark brings light to the enemy
...

It all becomes twisted,
When you are what you see,
4 years ago, I would have never dreamed,
I'm all I ever wanted,
...

</>Fill me with feelings
Of emotional restraint
Give me the power
To give up again
...

I know you don't understand
But I want to be your man
To be the one you call when you cry
I want to be their when you lie
...

I'm drunk and its been this way for weeks
every day a new bottle and I still feel weak
The morning hangovers and the lack of sleep
Make me feel better for the days of the week
...

Someday I'll leave it all behind
I'll take the gun and blow my mind
And then I'll feel complete
Another dead body on the street
...

Nothing can help when your alone
You call, but she won't answer the phone
What did you do so wrong?
That will make you hurt for so long
...

If your so real, so majestic
Show me your love,
Let me feel it
If your so powerful, so heroic
...

I check to see if you've called
Every 2 seconds it seems
I tried to forget you
But its impossible for me
...