Rob Hyden

My hero lives in a world filled with users, losers and snakes.
My hero is a man of character and would never be a fake.
My hero stands with pride and always steps up for the weak.
My hero is understanding and hears you when you speak.
...

I relaxed my thoughts refreshed my mood and try to clear my mind.
This is my ritual preparing for battle against the anxiety grind.
The wave of stress and the smell of panic greets me at the door.
I take a deep breath, focus my thoughts and bravely enter the store.
...

I am the crazy person hiding in the dark, peaking through the windows and never leave a mark.
I’m hiding in the shadows and always dress in black; If you try to follow me you will never see my track.
I am the crazy person people don't acknowledge, I wish I had the dollars I would have gone to college.
Society turns its back and pushes us away; let me tell you something, we are here to stay
...

I walk the streets in my sleep late into the night, no one knows I’m not awake and I never start a fight.
I make my way to the store to fill my grocery list, I’m always calm and keep my cool I never shake my fist.
I walk the aisles and check the shelves looking for a deal, even though I’m sleeping I’m sure I never steal.
Picking through the produce looking for the best, I never get distracted and I never need to rest.
...

A gentle wave of conscience laps against my moral sense of right.
My dark and guilty past has me searching through the night.
They see me as a quick and easy way to fuel their drug addiction.
I'm only seen as prey, not the second coming or the holy crucifixion.
...

I suffer from an infliction a phobia you may say.
Some people call it mental illness others run away.
My mental health is not a threat to anyone but me.
Won't rub off or pass through germs, always virus free.
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My friends invite me out for an evening on the town.
I hesitate before I answer, sorry I have to let you down.
If I go I always I end up in dark and lonely corner.
I’m so scared with my panic, I make a better mourner.
...

My quilt runs deep and my conscience is stone, my panic is burning all the way to the bone.
Fighting the battle and trying to survive, it’s becoming a challenge just staying alive.
My conscience is torn with memories of sin, it’s my inner battle I know I can’t win.
As I run from my past as fast as I can, I now fight my battles with paper and pen.
...

I fight with my mind through the depths of my brain, I’m searching and searching for that unbearable pain.
I’m sad and lonely in my world of voices, attacking my sanity and removing my choices.
Why must it be a sentence of crazy, judging my fears, my phobias you just think I’m lazy
As I live in my world alone and so cold, you all think I’m crazy, that’s what I’m told.
...

My anxiety starts to build my panic begins to surge, I fight like hell to beat it, my demons nasty urge
I know it’s only panic the darker side of fear, it’s only trying to warn me but I don’t like what I hear
My panic is a message my brain sends out to me, If I can restrain my fear, I know this is the key.
I tell myself be strong you have to stand and face it, no reason to be scared I know just where to place it
...

I just snapped back from a three day trip I know I never cleared.Filled with sadness and depression and an unrelenting fear.
I closed the curtains, shut off the phone, made sure I locked the door.
Alone in the dark with my thoughts and worries, I huddled on the floor.
My brain is scrambled, thoughts are lost, everything seems so fast.
...

I attack my anxiety and panic with a brutal dedication.
My doctor even put me on some wicked medication.
Two days and never noticed any difference in my brain.
Three days I was running from a nightmare kind of pain.
...

Anxiety is a mental form of mind corruption, an uneasy feeling like a fearful interruption.
Hiding in the background until the time is right, living just below the surface but always out of sight.
Has no thoughts of gender or fueled by your race, it affects us in an instant then gone without a trace.
It causes all your fears, it’s the reason for your panic, it can easily throw you in an endless state of manic.
...

I’m hanging by a thread of endless self-destruction, then my inner panic rises like a endless interruption.
All my haunting feelings of a painful darkened past, these are all the memories I know will always last.
I filled my life with sins and unrelenting pain, my guilt has taken over and eating at my brain.
Living with my panic is all I really know, it’s grabbing at my conscience and never lets me go.
...

As I sit for hours making plans for the trip I have to take.
I will count out loud for every step I know I have to make.
I gather all the strength I need as I’m walking out the door.
Left my house and hit the sidewalk, as I’m heading to the store.
...

How I picked my name sitting home alone one night.
I picked the name carefully, Rob Hyden in plain sight.
A name making common sense but still it’s good for me.
I am clearly out there in your face but always hard to see.
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I never worry if people see my lonely life of sadness.
All my raging panic, or my crazy kind of madness.
I never leave the house so I spend my time alone.
My only contact with then world is my telephone.
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I stop and chat with my neighbour nearly every day.
He greets me with a smile and asks me what I have to say.
He is always pleasant and he never makes me feel sad.
When I ask him how his day is, it’s always not so bad.
...

The battle was fought from the moment I woke.
My brain is being tested but something is broke.
The panic is rising and travels straight to my brain.
It takes over my thoughts and causes great pain.
...

Summer is over and leaves are starting to turn.
Soon to be raked into piles and carefully burned.
Days are getting shorter and there’s a chill in the air
As pumpkins are picked and they’re sold at the fair.
...