Treasure Island

Quotations From LAWRENCE BALTER

 

  • 1.
    To try to control a nine-month-old's clinginess by forcing him away is a mistake, because it counteracts a normal part of the child's development. To think that the child is clinging to you because he is spoiled is nonsense. Clinginess is not a discipline issue, at least not in the sense of correcting a wrongdoing.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? Ch. 2 (1989).

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  • 2.
    A toddler believes that if you love a person, you stay with that person 100 percent of the time.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? Ch. 3 (1989).

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  • 3.
    The parent in charge is the disciplinarian.... I do not believe in letting discipline wait for another parent to handle it, nor do I think the father or mother should be allowed to become a shadowy figure who walks in the door and has to play the bad guy in the house.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? Ch. 1 (1989).

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  • 4.
    When a toddler uses profanity, don't make a big deal about it. If you do, you give the child more power. After all, it's only a word—one that won't do much harm to anybody. In fact, if you think about it, a nasty word is a step up from hitting or biting someone. So look at it as a sign of growth.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? Ch. 3 (1989).

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  • 5.
    To make life more bearable and pleasant for everybody, choose the issues that are significant enough to fight over, and ignore or use distraction for those you can let slide that day. Picking your battles will eliminate a number of conflicts, and yet will still leave you feeling in control.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? "Speaking of Discipline," (1989).

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  • 6.
    As a parent, you will often serve as an inadvertent example to your child. A child will model himself after you in many areas: how you deal with frustration, settle disagreements and cope with not being able to have the things that you want, to name just three.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? (1989).

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  • 7.
    Many single parents say that they feel they have to be both a mother and a father to the child. This is impossible, so you may as well rule out that idea.... As a single parent, you cannot be both a man and a woman. Who you are is a parent.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? Ch. 7 (1989).

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  • 8.
    In many respects, the preteen years mimic adolescence, but without one essential ingredient: hormones.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's in Control? Ch. 6 (1989).
  • 9.
    To worry about spoiling an infant by comforting him when he cries is needless.... If you put the baby down and the baby cries, pick him up. His crying isn't a habit you should try to break. Your baby can't be taught not to cry.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? Ch. 2 (1989).

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  • 10.
    In a toddler's mind, agreeing with you means that he is indistinguishable from you.... The adamant little tot is fighting hard to solidify a personal sense of Self. Selfhood sometimes requires great sacrifice and often precludes cooperation.
    Lawrence Balter (20th century), U.S. psychologist and author. Who's In Control? Ch. 3 (1989).

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