When I Cease To Be Poem by Kanishk Gupta

'Its better to not have existed than to not have lived. But its much better to never have lived, than to have lived as if never existed.'

There are times,
a lot of times
When I fear
I may cease to be
I sit and think
of all those dreams
Meant for me
but yet to see.

There are things
still left to do
There are things
still left to see
There are things
still left to know
There are things
still left to be.

Then those summers many
When I'll want to bathe in the sunlight
Then those winters many
When I'll want to watch the falling dew
Then those autumns many
When I'll want to hear the rustling of leaves
Then those springs many
When I'll want to welcome life anew.

And what about the people,
I so ruthlessly hurt,
The words I said,
the things I did
Would I ever
get a chance again
To say a sorry
before I my farewell bid.

And what about the ones
who I know have lived for me
Could I ever thank them enough
before being claimed by the sea.
And then there are those
whom I have always lived for
Whom to I had promised to be there
to lead them to the shore.

Many more things now
come rushing to my head
Questioning my existence
indifferent to my death.
All the things I have done
all to make my presence felt
But nothing now matters anymore
for 'nothing' will be all that'll be left.