What Am I, Actor Or Diseased? Poem by Arfa Iris

they say with my manners i please
because i have heart disease.
they say i help others,
only to get back favors.
they say to catch attention i smile,
for which i am not worth while.
they say to cover the disease i act.
but why doesnt they see they fact?
that how can i act for so long?
to bear disease is nothing wrong.
why will i act to cover my disease
whats the need to please?
i am proud to wear the crown.
whether i laugh or i mourn.
still they hurt me, but i smile as if pleased.
then ask myself'what am i, actor or diseased?