What Am I? Poem by Suchitra Bandi

What am I? I ask myself today,
A selfish fiend who cares for none,
I would have been a human being,
if atleast, I could care for one.

Not at all bearing humanity,
my heart has become hellish,
I should have loved someone,
apart from myself, how I wish.

I have been deceiving people,
wearing the cloak of honesty,
I have been indulging myself,
under the cover of my modesty.

What have I done to myself?
What have I become now?
My heart feels no feeling at all,
no bond, no kinship, no love.

God help me change myself,
give me a chance to be a woman,
if you cannot forgive me, spare me,
at least, let me be a human.