Wanderlust Poem by Zoe Guillory

I am lost, exploring Wonderland in fear.
They speak in circles around me;
colors turn to sounds.
Paths among the endless trees
amount to nothing.
BUT THIS IS THE REAL WORLD.
No. I've read about this place.
A land where childhood goes to die.
I've scoffed at its inhabitants.
They seem to be natives;
so smug as they look at themselves
THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS
and see nothing.
Traveling between the trees
to tea parties and confusion.
They fear me.
Just a little.
But they fear nonetheless.
They fight their fear
as curiosity takes them over
and they look into my eyes.
All their hopes and dreams
amount to nothing.
Smiles are flashed
and feet shuffle bodies away.
And I go to the next state
in this kingdom of trees
to find my next victim.
My next friend.
But there is no one left.
I can't turn around. Only forward.
The back wall pushes me on.
The camera is rolling
and I hear rustling and laughter
and I look up
and see nothing.
Nothing.
Not even the ghostly grin
from old memories of kittens
playing with the yarn.
And so I shout.
Stomp my feet in the tantrum
that I had perfected.
No one heard.
Nothing to hear.
I made no sound.
The birds sung and giggled
in the back of my mind
and told me who I was.
Whispered- playing-
YOU ARE NOTHING.