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Dilantha Gunawardana


Virgin Monologues


How can my pilgrim heart
Trespass
On another human
When the body is a sentinel?

How can I
Wear my hymen
And not be a leper?

How can I
Exhibit my scarlet letter
To my lover
Only to be engulfed by shame?

How can I
Live in the closet
Married to a parasitic god?

How can I
Miss my lover
At the culmination
Of each and every date?

How can I
Be consumed by love
And not be consummated by her act?

How can I
Surrender myself in heart
But not in body?

How can I
Be a hero to my faith
But a traitor to mankind?

How can I
Cease to live
In the name of love?

How can I
Feel safe in love
Yet be alien to her antics?

How can I
Find my utopia in love
Only to summoned to his body
For a dystopian tryst

How can I
Be raped by a million mortal opinions
As I surrender to my lover?

How can I
Not bloom like a flower
As my lover deflowers?

How can I
Summon you god
And not
Blaspheme my religion?

How can I
Look in the mirror
And not see my perpetual tears?

How can I
Learn to make love
And not be consummated by self-hate?

How can I
Be so narcissistic
As to deprive my lover?

How can I
one day
Surrender to death
Knowing implicitly
My body is a temple?

Or will I
Always be a **** in heart
But a saint in body?

Or will I………….
Embrace heaven
Having passed my days
In a ruthless penitentiary?

Or is love a sham god?
And celibacy the devil?
And I, His apostle

Or will I…………..
Transcend my will
To feel for a fleeting moment
I am like the rest?

Or will I
Succumb………….
To the absence of warmth
In the vacuity of flesh

Or will I
Muse on, knowing deep down
I am a rebel to none
But a coward to many

Or will I……………just be me!

Submitted: Saturday, October 19, 2013
Edited: Tuesday, October 22, 2013

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

Thoughts of a female choice virgin..........

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