Unfamiliar Territory Poem by DAVID TERRY

This is unfamiliar territory for me
You see, I’ve never been here before
Before now, I had been the one who loved and gave
Thinking I saved but really hurt and who walked away, who wouldn’t commit
Or submit
And then you came along
You who had been there all along
And for you I leaped
I did it, I did leaped and I gambled and lost
It was what I chose
Gambled against a rigged game
The same you played all along I see
Devastated, hurting, lost, alone, misused
Abused
I’m used to other words describing my days
Like confident, smiling, laughter, contentment, conversation
When now all I want to do is retreat and lick my wounds
Amidst these mourning sounds you did this to me
I let it happen from she
Who I believed wanted and loved me
As I did you
And I need to find a way out of this dark room
I know there is a light here
There simply must be somewhere
Yet for now I cannot find it here in where I find myself
Without a map or guide or self
What happened to I want only you?
What happened to I love only you?
What happened to our plans to marry?
What happened to our children, our dreams, our tomorrow?
They were only the day before you went to him.
And here I will not hide how unsure I am now
Unsure of how to navigate the path ahead
My heart and soul left for dead
Full of ‘why’s’ and questions for which there is no answer
How can there be?
Here in unfamiliar territory