Ugly Day Poem by Andrus Cassian

So...
Is that's really all there's left to say
I don't have it in me to sabotage another Saturday
I don't have it in me to start the same conversation
maybe I need to spread out my circle
I crave conversation
I crave the laughter I'm able to get out
I crave the social life
but I crave solitude and silence a bit more
for all I get are the same replies I despise
for all I get is the same generic questions
'How are you', 'What's up'
Didn't we just cover this a minute ago
I don't know, you tell me
I need more people in my life
or I just need to sink like a stone to the bottom of the oceann
sleep for awhile...
I don't know
for even then I'd think I'd bore all the fish in the ocean
What am I really running from
driving everyone away
What am I really afraid of
besides the ridiculous
like snow, like clowns, like jellyfish
What am I really afraid of...you
Another you...
What am I really afraid of...
another day to take me by the hair
and throw me into a ditch
leaving me battered and broken
What am I really afraid of...
waking up and realizing it's one more ugly day
What am I really afraid of...
becoming just a stop sign down dull avenue
at the corner of parties and celebrity gossip
Irrelevance
Welcome to my life
Dull Avenue
where random is said to be a really ugly thing
on this ugly day