Tstl Poem by simi faey

why is it that all the dead heads come in to ED at 3am? ?
why cant we give them a diagnosis of 'Too Stupid To Live'
surely there should be an ICD-9/ DSM criterion for these people.
That blue growth from your navel is not a cancer you moron,
its lint! and youre Too Stupid To Live.
Im sorry,
it appears that your 3 casks of wine have not been poisoned
with anything other than alcohol! ! !
you idiot...youre Too Stupid To Live.
Im sure you dont know how that motorcycle spring / light bulb/ potato/ purple intruder,
got up your anus,
perhaps thats because youre Too Stupid To Live! !
feeling sick
because you siphoned the septic tank
and not the petrol tank from a mobile home,
well youre Too Stupid To Live!
For anyone that has seen this type of patient at 3am
and sent them home
wishing there was a more appropriate diagnosis for the discharge,
or for anyone who needs a more definitive diagnosis
but cant find one in the DSM,
JOIN THE CAUSE
to have the diagnosis of Too Stupid To Live
become an essential part of the medical dictionaries
and share a few of your stories while youre at it.