This Darkness Poem by Jemmima Hayes

I have so many faces,
Sometimes I wonder which one they like the most,
They don’t see my scars,
They don’t see my pain behind this silly facade,
Sometimes I wish I was still your little girl,
Sometimes I wish I was a better friend, a better sister,
I know I disappoint, but I get so angry, so scared,
Can’t you see how I try? Try to be so good,
My fears are childish I know, but please, you must understand,
I am scared, so scared,
Scared of the things that go bump in the night,
Scared of what this big wide world has in store for me,
...And sometimes I wonder, what little ole' me would think of me now,
Grown up, where pain is just another something I have to deal with,

Can't you see what your mean words mean to me brother,
How I take them to heart, keep them locked in a little box,
Tucked safely away in the depths of my mind,
It is an amazing thing the mind; it doesn't forget all those hateful things you said
Why are you so mean brother?
Though I suppose I understand, I hate me to,

Daddy, I'm still your little girl can't you see, I'm just a little bit broken,
I know you think I'm embarrassed of you,
You're wrong, so wrong, I'm the proudest little girl in the world,
Its okay, daddy, I know you don't mean those horrible things you say,
It's alright, I swear, you're not the only one,

I shall cry, cleanse all this nastiness from my heart,
So in the morning, when I shall rise, I can wear a smile,
To tell you I'm alright,
While on the inside another piece of me shall wither, break and fall,
Fall into the darkness that wishes to claim my soul,
I'll play this eternal game of hide and seek,
Lying to and alienating those I care about,
Because it's the only way to keep my heart safe from all the treachery that waits patiently,
Waiting for me to fall off my pedestal,

I know you think you're funny, judging me like you do, you try,
You try so hard, try so hard to make me crack, that I almost feel sorry for you,
I can't hate you, no matter how hard I try because,
I know someone must have made you cold, or maybe I am too easy to forgive,
There was once a time where I was naive to believe you liked me,
It makes me sick,
Now I see this world for what it is,
The way people lie, deceive and hurt those they claim to love, it's a horrible truth
But alas, it's the honest truth,
This darkness is a constant thing; it's like a blanket of morbid comfort,
It wraps the world in a tight embrace, like a mother does a child, we can fight it,
But though the sun will rise, darkness will fall eventually, even in paradise...

You broke me into a scared little heap of a girl, who gave you the right!
But, now it is all said and done, I suppose I can only thank you,
For you have made me stronger,
Now I can fight this darkness, it won't stay put for long,
But now, I shall no longer run from destiny's path.