The Youth Of Today. Poem by Glenn Ford

She slouched into the off licence with a child in a pram
'I need some f***ing cider, ' she said, 'for my old f***ing man.'
'How many would you like? ' Said the, man behind the bar
She said, 'just enough to get him p****d, I'll have twenty ta.'

'While you're at it I'll have a bottle of the hard stuff off the shelf.'
'Only the one though, 'cause my old man says it aint good for me health'
'I told him, I know what's good for me, so I don't drink lots of these.'
'Oh while you're at it, I'll have fourty of your cheapest cigarettes please.'

On the way out the baby started crying for its food
She said 'Hey mate I hope you don't think I'm being f***ing rude.'
'But the baby's hungry and I'm out of money and I think its s**t its self.'
'Could you nip next door and buy some chocolate so I can shove it in its mouth.'

The man complied and went next door to fetch the baby's choc
When he returned he found he had a nasty little shock
The pair had gone and so had had the contents of his till
He said, 'I don't understand the youth of today and I think I never will.'