Beach Girl


The Sea Girl - Poem by Beach Girl

When I was just a little girl
They brought me to the sea
I waded out as waves unfurled
Their salty gifts on me

Seaweed, shells and whole sand dollars
Were strewn along the shores
Each a gem of ocean wonders
Formed on soft sea floors

As years flew by and she grew tall
She never lost her passion
Most nights she'd hear the ocean call
And dreamt of wild waves crashing

The sea girl couldn't shake the call
Salt water coursed her veins
Returning to the old sea wall
She felt her heart unchained

Miles and miles of endless sea
It took her breath away
The blue, the blue, oh it does scheme
To drive one quite insane

Thunderous and angry waves
They threw themselves ashore
The aqua hues grew dark and grey
The rain drops she ignored

She ran down to the water
And lay upon the sand
The pleasure that this brought her
Caused rain and tears to blend

The drumming of the thunder
Became a distant song
Soon there was just a murmur
The raging storm was gone

When she awoke and gazed about
She found herself entwined
Seaweed and shells her form did flout
Gems from the sea, her finds


Comments about The Sea Girl by Beach Girl

  • Silver Star - 3,342 Points Darlene Walsh (4/2/2015 5:45:00 PM)

    I like this poem a lot, it's a lovely story about the sea and the love the girl has for the sea. It was fun to read, it flows nice and I like the rhyming. Although I'm not sure what the last stanza means, it still sounds dreamy.

    Darla :) (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Gold Star - 15,419 Points Kim Barney (3/23/2015 1:57:00 PM)

    I really like this poem, although I have to agree with Bri Edwards about the use of the word FLOUT. It doesn't really make sense as used here.
    Also, in the second line of verse seven, you should use LAY instead of LAID. Sorry, I can't help it. I used to be an English teacher.
    Great work, however! Keep writing. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 8,667 Points Bri Edwards (1/24/2015 3:01:00 PM)

    some of my favorites:

    Each a gem of ocean wonders
    Formed on soft sea floors

    .....wild waves crashing'

    The blue, the blue, oh it does scheme
    To drive one quite insane

    Caused rain and tears to blend

    Seaweed and shells her form did flout
    Gems from the sea, her finds



    =============================
    i HAD to look up flout to decide if i liked it. i'd like its synonym disregard in the poem even more, even though it doesn't rhyme with about.
    - - - - - - - -
    flout
    flout/
    verb
    verb: flout; 3rd person present: flouts; past tense: flouted; past participle: flouted; gerund or present participle: flouting

    openly disregard (a rule, law or convention) .
    these same companies still flout basic ethical practices
    synonyms: defy, refuse to obey, disobey, break, violate, fail to comply with, fail to observe, contravene, infringe, breach, commit a breach of, transgress against;
    ignore, disregard
    countless retailers flout the law by selling cigarettes to children
    antonyms: observe
    archaic
    mock; scoff.
    the women pointed and flouted at her

    BUT THAT'S THE ONLY THING WHICH KEPT ME FROM THOROUGHLY ENJOYING THE POEM, and i had decided to send it to MyPoemList even before i finished reading.

    i did notice a switch from first person narration to third person narration, but i could live with that, and i might even like it. yes, i like it!
    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

    this is a great poem! the rhymes i will call imperfect, but i liked them very much. there was some way words rhymed while not exactly rhyming. very nice. if you had tried to rhyme with what i would call exact rhyming, the poem would probably NOT be SO GOOD! bri :) (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 16,745 Points Fabrizio Frosini (1/24/2015 1:04:00 PM)

    a very nice finale.. Thanks for sharing, ''Beach Girl'' (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 6,668 Points Col Muhamad Khalid Khan (12/3/2014 12:20:00 AM)

    When she awoke and gazed about
    She found herself entwined
    Seaweed and shells her form did flout
    Gems from the sea, her finds
    A very good poem.I enjoyed it.
    Col Muhammad Khalid Khan (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 2 Points Luna Tsuki (11/9/2013 4:21:00 AM)

    A very touching poem, well done. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 72 Points Alexander Coppedge (11/5/2013 11:36:00 AM)

    Delightful. A really good flow, most of the time. It did sway. Yet you recaptured and finished this art wonderfully. (Report) Reply

  • Bronze Star - 2,514 Points Hans Vr (10/31/2013 8:17:00 PM)

    enjoyed reading this poem very much.
    Ecellent (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 324 Points Beach Girl (10/29/2013 9:57:00 AM)

    Thanks you Savita! I read some of your poems too, they are just lovely! (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 6,054 Points Savita Tyagi (10/29/2013 8:47:00 AM)

    I am trying to read the poems that I missed reading during contest time. This one is really beautiful. congratulations for fourth place. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 8,564 Points Khairul Ahsan (10/27/2013 10:16:00 PM)

    Sorry to see this poem miss the honors by the narrowest margin!
    Congratulations on winning the 4th position, that's no mean achievement either! (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 678 Points Ramesh T A (10/21/2013 4:47:00 AM)

    Nicely composed poem just as your name reflects in this poem! (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 13,405 Points Ramesh Rai (10/18/2013 6:06:00 AM)

    lovely write. loved reading again and again (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 13,405 Points Ramesh Rai (10/18/2013 6:06:00 AM)

    lovely write. loved reading again and again (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 21 Points Dr Tapan Kumar Pradhan (10/18/2013 1:23:00 AM)

    Dear Beach Girl, I loved your poem. Veery good imagination, vivid description and flow of words.You have a real talent here, which can be honed still further. Wish you all the best for the contest. But you cannot predict anything in an Online Contest like this - which can be easily manipulated by cyber savvy poets! ! (See my poem Poem Hunter Contest Final just to have an idea of how a contest can be manipulated...) (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Fanny Fransijn (9/25/2013 2:24:00 PM)

    Beautiful poem...!
    I am moved and have to read it again and again. (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 4,099 Points Patricia Grantham (9/19/2013 9:03:00 AM)

    A wonderful poem this is. You are very gifted in your expressions.
    The sea and all its wonders to experience and explore. An excellent
    blend of words and scenery this is. Keep on penning Beach Girl! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Ratnakar Mandlik (9/19/2013 2:51:00 AM)

    An excellent poem with captivating power. I liked it very much. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 19 Points Goldheart Bird (9/17/2013 10:42:00 AM)

    I love this poem! It is very well written! I give it a Excellent! : D (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 8,564 Points Khairul Ahsan (9/4/2013 1:23:00 AM)

    The beach girl has beautifully drawn the portrait of a sea girl! So nice to read, well written, dear poet! (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Thursday, June 20, 2013

Poem Edited: Monday, March 23, 2015


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