The Missing Ling (A Xmas Fable) Poem by Douglas Scotney

Douglas Scotney

Douglas Scotney

Toowoomba, Queensland, Australia. Resides in Adelaide

The Missing Ling (A Xmas Fable)



At Xmas time we know
The pressure is intense
To buy and wrap and give
And eat beyond all sense.

Gaz the vegetarian,
Not to be contrarian,
Will eat a bit of fish,
While all around
It's fowl or pig
Make up the common dish.

Gaz went out to buy his fish
All on a Xmas Eve;
Came out of a shop in So Ho
Shocked and empty-handed:
Trevalla, at 46 a kilo,
Left him beached,
But in no way stranded.

He went to Woolies in Wellington Mall
But could nae come at the basa:
He'd seen what they put in the Mekong River,
Would nae come at the basa at all.

Chaz and Doug did the other shopping,
Chatted with Barbara and Don,
And listened to a busker,
Fin Timm or Denva Jon.

Doug watched young guys
Hitch up their pants
And thought of the folly of fashion.
Don said his son, named William Cox,
Was developing a writing passion.

Finally Gaz found some ling
Down by the dockside punt.
His big wide grin portrayed his glory.
Yet that's just half the story.

Back at home the berry pudding
Was made and refrigerated.
The placement of the fish in fridge
Was long and hard debated,
(Gaz's greatest fear
Was that we would leave it here) .

Next morn they packed up
All the food
And left the table in a great big mess.
They drove to Snug for dinner.
Time soon came to fry the ling,
But do you think they could find the thing?

Kind Connie to the rescue
Gave some salmon to appease The Gaz,
Then wrapped up what remained
And whacked it in the fridge.
Gaz looked in and saw the thing
And thought it was his ling.

Con and John left first.
Gaz and Chaz and Doug went next.
Forgot to bring the ling.
Gaz went back to get it:
Couldn't find the bloody thing!
Thought John and Con must have it.

Gaz then thought, his brain on fire,
'Con has got the package,
And what's inside is not the ling,
What's inside's the salmon,
And back at home inside my fridge
Is where the ling is sitting! '

Back home said Doug, to end this fable,
'All Gaz says is so, except,
Instead of sitting in the fridge,
Here's the ling amongst the mess,
Stinking on the table.'

POET'S NOTES ABOUT THE POEM
So Ho is South Hobart. It really happened. And he had to throw the fish out. I wrote it on Boxing Day. My longest poem in this period of creativity.
COMMENTS OF THE POEM
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Douglas Scotney

Douglas Scotney

Toowoomba, Queensland, Australia. Resides in Adelaide
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