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Avinash Nair

Rookie - 88 Points (19/10/1988)

The Enigma of My Mind


The subtle loneliness that hath,
Built its walls were crumbling,
As I ventured into that path
Of needs and belonging.
Those harsh realities were
Mellowed by sparks of care,
And those unspoken fears
Doused by happy tears.
But now the question that troubles me is
Will this be a long lived bliss?

Submitted: Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Edited: Tuesday, November 26, 2013

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  • Freshman - 1,482 Points Dinesh Nair (11/26/2013 7:31:00 AM)

    A fine poem that discusses a state of mind inevitably arising out of a strategic outlook.. The rendering too is fine. I feel that you may better replace 'hath' by 'has' as a lone odd word has nothing to do with the ensuing lines.. It is up to you Avinash.
    Keep writing. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 26 Points Lucifera Santez (11/26/2013 4:00:00 AM)

    And those unspoken fears
    Doused by happy tears.
    wonderful lines.
    loved it.
    please read some of my poems and comment.
    :) (Report) Reply

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